There’s quitting something that, while you’ve invested a lot of time, energy, and emotion into it, you know it simply isn’t right for you in the long-term. And there’s quitting something that, while hard, and sometimes may test you like nothing else, you know is fundamentally good for you long-term.
The former, while difficult to accept losing the time investment into it, is often an easy quit. You can see that despite what you put into it, it’s simply never going to be what you hoped or thought it would be.
And then, there’s the latter. This is often the…
Your current life is familiar. It’s perhaps easy. It’s one you’ve shaped, formed, attached your self to, and found a home within.
But, along your journey and amidst your changing, there’s growth. And that growth can make you see, feel, experience things that were once familiar to you in a different light.
It can make you feel discomfort, in places you found comfort. It can make you feel irritable, at things you once felt patience. It can make you change your perspective at things you previously felt neutral about.
It can make you outgrow your current life, and grow into…
One of the worst parts of being in a relationship is watching your partner struggle through something. Whether you can help or not, it’s terrible to see someone you love and care for to be stuck in the trenches.
It leaves you feeling helpless, them feeling alone, and creates a divide where you’re watching the same narrative unfold but experience it as two separate entities. You’ll want to hug them, hold them, protect them, but sometimes you may struggle to get your words out, or to show genuine empathy for what they’re going through.
But sometimes it’s not that easy…
Dating is supposed to be, and often is, fun. But to get to the in-person dating stage, a-lot of background noise, requirements, and entry barriers often come first. Most notably: dating apps.
This summer, it’ll be 5 years since I was on dating apps, plural. As an socially anxious introvert who lived in a small town, dating apps were really all I had to meet someone, anyone, outside of my already small circle.
Research shows dating apps, when compared to “traditional” dating, lead to a higher level of anxiety. …
I was raised in a small town where people who were born there, generally stayed there. There was shared a collective expectancy of what a “successful” life looked like (house, job, marriage, children — the usual). For generations in my family the cycle repeated, expected. No-one broke the cycle. Everyone, without consciously realising it, conformed.
In my early twenties, I began to question why this was just a thing that people did, relatively without question. Yet no-one was happy — they had the same issues, the same complaints. …
Every choice you make impacts your life in some way. Whether you see it or not, feel it or not, trust it, or not — every choice is writing a small fragment of your story. The magic within that is that you’re in the blank page, writing one chapter at a time.
Some go relatively unscathed — what restaurant to eat at, what shoes to buy, what book to read; others, not so much.
Others have the potential to change everything. Others, alter your life as you know it. Others, are the more impactful choices you will ever make.
Sometimes, you have to let yourself break away from that which has kept you safe, but kept you alone.
Sometimes, you have to let yourself break away from that which was made for a past version of you, but not the current.
Sometimes you have to let yourself break away from that which has clipped your wings, so that you can finally soar.
It takes a brave and courageous heart to break. One that’s willing to be vulnerable during the uncertainty. One that’s willing to struggle for that which matters deeply, instead of being comfortable in that which doesn’t.
Familiarity, easy and comfort are the greatest causes of remaining stagnant in situations, circumstances, relationships, that are meeting the mere base of our wants and desires.
Because in satisfying the most basic of our needs, it’s easy to settle; in the comfort, the safe, the security.
It’s easy to think because the foundational boxes are ticked, the deep desires must go unmatched. That, by still desiring them; you’re asking for too much, you’re not expressing gratitude, you’re unappreciative of having your basic needs met.
But in this life, don’t you want to experience more than baseline?
Don’t you want to…
In a world where we live in the now, in the temporary, with little to no commitment knowing just how quick we can move onto the next, please know, your version of love, and your desire to love, doesn’t have to follow this narrative.
You do not need to fall into a fragment of time, of being the latest interest, of making do “for now”, of gratifying someone else's temporary needs, of filling their own void, of validating their own warped yet sadly normalised version of modern love.
Because in a society that does truly love with one foot out…
Please know that it’s good to feel good about yourself. And that you should, feel good about yourself.
And, please see the disconnect between someone’s life-highlights on Instagram, of a picture that they post of themselves that’s inversely communicating how good they feel about themselves in it, while not following up with written confirmation. …